Scoop du jour

I do most of my grocery shopping on Sunday morning. On most occasions the stores are empty and the aisles are well-stocked with the items I need to survive another week here at Crabb Hollow.

Today I did my usual rounds and headed to the one checkstand that was open for business. While waiting, I read the tabloid headlines for the latest Hollywood gossip, usually accompanied by unflattering photographs of the hapless celebrity.

There, glaring out at me in bold caps was the lede “WHITNEY COLLAPSES!”, followed by “It’s worse than anyone knows!”. Yeah, I guess it was. The troubled diva was found dead in her hotel room last night, right before she was scheduled to sing at the Grammys.

It’s another coup for The National Enquirer. Readers may recall that it was The Enquirer, not the Post, not the Times, that uncovered the sordid truth about former Senator and ’04 VP candidate John Edwards and his pregnant mistress. You would think such a scoop would earn a Pulitzer for the fearless reporters, but no, such rewards are not meant for purveyors of ghetto journalism. It would be too embarrassing.

But now the Enquirer team has beat the mainstreamers to the punch again. Maybe I should subscribe.

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4 Responses to Scoop du jour

  1. E. Christina Dabis says:

    Sorry to be slow to visit your blog. Thank goodness you phoned to tell me about it as I seldom check that e-mail account any longer. When you get a chance to update my e-mail address to be the one I just entered here.

    I do enjoy reading your thoughts and conclusions. It’s as refreshing as a breath of fresh air!

    Be well, my friend….

  2. Michael Anderson says:

    The Inquirer is an exemplary publication. They’ve had lots of unacknowledged scoops. When I read the pulp racks at the grocery checkout, I always view the Enquirer headlines differently.

  3. Don Baumgart says:

    I’m reminded of that great scene in the first Men in Black movie where Tommy Lee Jones picks up a tabloid off a newsstand, calling it “the real news” because it tells about aliens.

    • rl Crabb says:

      It’s a real shame we don’t have the Weekly World News to fill us in on what the aliens are up to. Somewhere in a box I still have the issues from ’92 when all the presidential candidates were jockeying for the endorsement of the Alien. Best issue had a photo of the spaceman and Ross Perot yucking it up. I often wondered what the joke was. Maybe something like “a Vulcan, a Romulan and a Klingon walk into a bar…”

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